Finally decided what book to start posting on Textnovel. It’s actually the first book that I ever wrote called “Through the Loop”. This book follows seventeen-year-old Hailey, her fourteen-year-old brother Craig, and their friends as they fall through a portal into another region known as Rownomfer. The region is at once more and less developed than our own. Once there, they take up with a band of rebels made up of cyganics and splices. Cyganics are humans genetically altered so they have computer-like intelligence and sometimes mechanical parts, while splices are humans altered to have animal senses and strengths. This group of rebels know that a trollish war tribe from another region is trying to take over their region, but cannot convince the King because he is too busy trying to kill them simply for existing. Magic and technology move hand in hand through the story as Hailey and the others help fight to save the region and the new friends they have made there.
In posting the book on Textnovel the last few days, I can really see where my writing has improved over the years. I find myself deleting a lot of it and re-writing. At the heart of it I think it was a good story to start with, but I feel the need to change things like a paragraph where every sentence starts with ‘she’ as in the following:
She went to the cupboard and took out a glass. She looked over her shoulder at her brother, but he shook his head. She shrugged, and poured herself a glass of water. She went to sit beside the window, waiting for their father to come home. She wasn’t sure how she would explain what happened.
That’s not a real paragraph, but it is similar to one I deleted. So what started out as an easy, ‘Oh I’ll add this one’ has ended up a lot more work than I expected.
I am adding new chapters as often as possible so follow this link to read.
http://www.textnovel.com/story/Through-The-Loop/6153/